Tag: LarryLand
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Jokes To Make You Groan
This is courtesy of Daniel, Age 8: Q: What happens when a bird get sick? A: He gets Crow-Vid. This is courtesy of Larry, Age 60: Q: What is 6 feet to a Podiatrist? A: Three patients. Who says you have to grow up?
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The Pillow Problem
I love those insurance commercials where a pretend doctor “Rick” helps young homeowners from becoming their parents, as it that is somehow preventable. These are always based on horrible cliches. I have done EVERY. SINGLE. ONE. I remember one of the early ads where he is removing pillows from a couch that is absolutely covered…
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Blanding In
I’m quite sure that in the employees’ lounge of my local supermarket there is a grainy photo of me, taken by one of the security cameras, with the a large statement in bold type: DO NOT TALK TO THIS MAN It would be completely justified.
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How Ballet Lead Me To A Life of Crime
If you had asked me when I was young if I would ever be the president of a ballet company, much less in the cast of a Nutcracker, I’d have thought you were nuts. For the last 10 years, I’ve been in the cast of the Ballet Etudes Nutcracker. I do this simply because they…
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Thirty-Six years in the Making
After 36 years, we finally get to spend Thanksgiving with you in Vermont. We may never be the same – at the very least we’ll probably never lose the approximately 1,000 pounds we gained feasting. Thanksgiving is a time of tradition, regardless the coast you are on. We visited from California, 36 years in the…
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Getting it Wright
In this morning’s papers, there was a quote that Orville and Wilbur Wright proved in 1903 that “you could make a heavier-than-air craft that would take off and fly and not fall down, but it didn’t mean you could fly from Los Angeles to London right away”. That’s true – you still had to clear…
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Local Colding
They say the best thing about Southern California is the weather. That is not true; it is the weather reports on our local news. I watch the weather reporters hard at work (that is to say usually bored stiff with no apparent weather to discuss) every morning at about 6:30. When I saw this weather…
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Hazardous Surf(er)
For the last several months, the City of Huntington Beach has had a work crew on the pier. Their job is to remove unwanted aquatic life from around the pier. I see them often going over the side with various equipment, moving slowly and cautiously around, and appreciate their difficult work. This morning they were…
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Bad Grinch…..BAD!!!
Breaking News – This just into the LarryLand News Desk (pretty much just a regular desk when you get right down to it). The Grinch Has Stolen Christmas Again! Captured on camera, the Grinch is clearly standing over the prone body of Mr. Claus, allegedly holding Santa’s gift bag. Local police are asking for the…
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What’s in a Name?
There is a time-honored tradition of all seasoned parents. It is our job to provide useful ‘advice’ to them until they run to the hills. When my friends announced that they were going to have their first child, I immediately went into overdrive. I believe they are now hiding under their desks. In any case,…
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