So, Gisele Bundchen, supermodel, has a cookbook. Or a plea for help. I’m not quite sure.
The book is entitled “Nourish Gisele Bundchen”. As an author, she should understand the concept of commas. There’s the old cliche “Let’s eat, Grandma” vs. “Let’s eat Grandma”. In fact, when you are talking to Grandma, it is important to actually say “Let’s Eat, Comma, Grandma” so that she’s sure of what you’re saying and does not live in fear. Siri, mind you, would provide 100 grandma-proven recipes to choose from.
I found these books at my favorite bookstore in Sonoma (Readers’ Books.com). I’ve always had a great time getting cookbooks off their shelves. I think they’re trying to tell poor Gisele something by putting it next to “How to Cook Everything Fast”, as if to offer her book some helpful hints. Given that the average daily diet of a supermodel is 2 celery sticks (grown organically by locally sourced llamas in the Himalayas, so they must be healthy), I can only assume that the Readers’ staff is very concerned for her well-being. Perhaps they can arrange a telethon to feed hungry celebrities, complete with sad-eyed pictures of Gisele staring at a steak. Just a thought.
That said, I think I found a better option. I found the Boston Cooking School Cook Book – the original Fannie Farmer cookbook. It turns out that Ms. Farmer was quite into nutrition in her day, designing helpful diets for people with Diabetes.
The copy I have was printed in 1936 and belonged to Mrs. Frances Weedman. It has something like a zillion recipes but also helpful hints on all sorts of things.
Helpful Planning Tips – In a chapter called Menu Making we are told that it should “put gaiety into housekeeping” because “most housewives who are bored with planning meals are those who have a cooking repertory of limited range and are conservative about trying anything new.”
Important Safety Tips – Such as you should be cooking certain recipes on your Asbestos Mat. I don’t have an asbestos mat, but now I think I need one. Perhaps I should try Amazon.
Useful Product References – Best of all, an ad section in the back for all sorts of cooking items and gizmos. A $2 oven thermometer, a coal-burning stove (goes well with your Asbestos Mat; Amazon recommends you buy both), and helpful books you can purchase for the Modern Hostess, including “Spending the Family Income”.
But I believe the most helpful item is the ad for preventing the social scourge of dishpan hands, which I would assume Ms. Bundchen would really make good use of given her profession. (I hear that there are unauthorized pictures of Cindy Crawford’s hands on FaceTwit, and that she has subsequently gone into hiding). Best part for the penny-pinching cook: it costs less than a cent a day, which is very helpful for her as she’s worth something like five trillion bucks.
For actual cookery recipes, I do have one bone to pick. My chapter on Custards is mixed in with Fish cooking (I kid you not). For example, to test a Baked Custard I am instructed: “To test, insert knife in custard; skin on one side from bony part of the gills.”
There are many things I do not want to eat – fish bones and gills in my custard being one of them. Then again, Yelp has provided me the “Top 10 Best Fish Ice Cream in Los Angeles”, so perhaps I’m behind the times.
In any case, I hope that poor Gisele gets a chance to have a nice meal. My thanks to the folks at Readers, for simply being there and being cool by letting me into your store for 22 years. You allow me to stock my kitchen.
Now off to try some Trout A La Mode.
LARRYLAND 
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