Tag: LarryLand
-
Cleanup in Aisle 2
We’ve all heard this phrase in Star Trek from Dr. McCoy: “Dammit Jim, I’m a Doctor, not a …..” One thing is conspicuously absent from the list: He never said he wasn’t a maid. I would like to think that I am King of LarryLand. Closer to the truth – I am the janitor of…
-
The Brady Bunch
So, the new hit movie “80’s for Brady” is scoring big at the box office. I’ve not seen it, but my understanding is that a bunch of crazed octogenarians, led by Rita Moreno, join the NFL and sack Tom Brady. This can only mean one thing… Sequels.
-
Jokes To Make You Groan
This is courtesy of Daniel, Age 8: Q: What happens when a bird get sick? A: He gets Crow-Vid. This is courtesy of Larry, Age 60: Q: What is 6 feet to a Podiatrist? A: Three patients. Who says you have to grow up?
-
The Pillow Problem
I love those insurance commercials where a pretend doctor “Rick” helps young homeowners from becoming their parents, as it that is somehow preventable. These are always based on horrible cliches. I have done EVERY. SINGLE. ONE. I remember one of the early ads where he is removing pillows from a couch that is absolutely covered…
-
Blanding In
I’m quite sure that in the employees’ lounge of my local supermarket there is a grainy photo of me, taken by one of the security cameras, with the a large statement in bold type: DO NOT TALK TO THIS MAN It would be completely justified.
-
How Ballet Lead Me To A Life of Crime
If you had asked me when I was young if I would ever be the president of a ballet company, much less in the cast of a Nutcracker, I’d have thought you were nuts. For the last 10 years, I’ve been in the cast of the Ballet Etudes Nutcracker. I do this simply because they…
-
Thirty-Six years in the Making
After 36 years, we finally get to spend Thanksgiving with you in Vermont. We may never be the same – at the very least we’ll probably never lose the approximately 1,000 pounds we gained feasting. Thanksgiving is a time of tradition, regardless the coast you are on. We visited from California, 36 years in the…
-
Getting it Wright
In this morning’s papers, there was a quote that Orville and Wilbur Wright proved in 1903 that “you could make a heavier-than-air craft that would take off and fly and not fall down, but it didn’t mean you could fly from Los Angeles to London right away”. That’s true – you still had to clear…
-
Local Colding
They say the best thing about Southern California is the weather. That is not true; it is the weather reports on our local news. I watch the weather reporters hard at work (that is to say usually bored stiff with no apparent weather to discuss) every morning at about 6:30. When I saw this weather…
-
Hazardous Surf(er)
For the last several months, the City of Huntington Beach has had a work crew on the pier. Their job is to remove unwanted aquatic life from around the pier. I see them often going over the side with various equipment, moving slowly and cautiously around, and appreciate their difficult work. This morning they were…
LARRYLAND 